Wednesday, November 17, 2010

New CD releases for November 22nd

It was a real struggle to get to seven worthy releases this week. After all, this is Thanksgiving week and most people are out buying turkeys. Having read through the list of new releases I now understand the true meaning of irony. Enjoy.

Pretty Hate Machine: 2010 RemasterNine Inch Nails – Pretty Hate Machine: 2010 Remaster
This is Trent Rezor's first born child and it is now old enough to buy it's own beer. Considering this was originally a part time, self funded solo venture back in the late 80's this remaster might be interesting to revisit, just to see if the musical naivety which gave the album it's charm has been replaced with a more professional edge.

My Beautiful Dark Twisted FantasyKanye West – My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy
I read somewhere that Kanye West has won 14 Grammys. I also read somewhere that Kanye West is an asshole. Asshole or not, Kanye West brings a unique sound to the world of music, and by unique I mean awful. Yet again an R+B/hip-hop/whateva-you-call-this-musical-style CD with a proliferation of expletives. Pass.

34 Number OnesAlan Jackson – 34 Number Ones
This should have been called 34 Number Ones plus 3 extra tracks OR I have had 34 Number ones but I had 15 minutes left at the end of disc 2 so I filled it with other stuff.
Alan Jackson is as much a pillar of the Nashville community as the Grand Ol Opry, with 20 years of twanging under his belt, and did anyone mention he has had 34 number 1 hit singles? Tell us Alan, were these number ones all on the Country Music Chart? Yep, thought so. Well I have had 300 number ones on the 'I like to sing in the shower' chart and that's just in 2010.

CannibalKe$ha – Cannibal
I doubt there is any recognizable trace of the real Ke$ha anywhere on this CD. The ingredients were dumped into the big computer mixing machine, processed repeatedly and then released to the unsuspecting public. It is unfortunate that talented performers like Kesha are required to follow the crowd and produce mindless drivel. If you can put up with the autotuned, glitchy candyfloss exterior then you may just spot a subtle touch of humor underneath.

Libra ScaleNe-Yo – Libra Scale
Wow if this guy was any smoother the women would just slide right off him. He was born Shaffer Chimere Smith, and changed his name to Tef-Lon when he began his musical career. DuPont sued his ass for blatant trademark infringement and so Ne-Yo was born.

Libra Scale, is a monumental concept album that tells the story of the rise of R&B's first superhero squad, The Gentleman, a trio of garbage men who are granted all that they've ever wanted--special powers, money, fame, women-- after encountering a mysterious figure. The only catch? The men must use their powers to fight crime in their city and must never ever fall in love. Not a problem until Jerome (Ne-Yo) meets Pretty Sinclair, a vivacious, no-nonsense beauty. He quickly captures her heart. But all goes awry when after a night of passion, Pretty Sinclair contracts a strain of Jerome's superpowers and suffers an adverse reaction that effectively drives her crazy.”
Sounds like a movie could be in the works, watch out 'Howard the Duck'.

VoicesThe Benedictine Nuns and Abbaye de Notre-Dame de l'Annonciation – Voices
These women went after the Guinness World Record for longest artist name and nailed it. This sounds like Enigma (remember the relaxing Gregorian chants with the laid back beats?) but without the laid back beats. Basically it's a bunch of French nuns singing. Zoot and Dingo appear as guest vocals on track 7, 'Spankings at Castle Anthrax'.
Remember, it's OK to kiss a nun once, just don't get into the habit.

Happy ChristmasJessica Simpson – Happy Christmas
Holy Shit, (pun intended) they are creeping out of the woodwork to cash in on Christmas. Jessica Simpson has 2 outstanding talents and singing is not one of them. Neither is acting or successful relationships. She has just announced her enagagement to ex-NFLer Eric Johnson. Maybe persistance is one of her talents.

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