Top 10 rides at Universal Islands of Adventure

By Ian C

Hello Penguin Slappers, this is a slight deviation from our usual satirical storyline, delving into the depths of serious reporting. The following post reveals my top 10 favorite rides at Universal Islands of Adventure theme park in Orlando, Florida.

 © Universal Islands of Adventure

Tina Turner named as favorite in Dead Pool

By Ian C

Hi everyone, it's been a while, but I had to respond to a comment made on an old post from 2015 regarding the sad deaths of Ben E. King and B.B. King. The anonymous commenter directly blamed us for the subsequent deaths of Prince and, I assume, Queen Elizabeth II. They then followed up by suggesting we had a Dead Pool and that people should bet on Tina Turner.

Tina Turner, still alive at time of writing

SLAPDATE: As of 4/19/23, Tina Turner is not dead, and if she does die between now and some time in the future, then it's not our fault.

SLAPDATE 2: Today is May 25th 2023 and we are sorry to say that Tina Turner has died. Since this post was written 44 days prior her death, we can not be held responsible for anything except maybe a touch of bad taste, but we are known for that anyway. RIP Tina.