Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Gone Direction

By +Sue Casa

Excuse me, guy hiding under a rock, did you hear that Zayn Malik has quit One Direction? One Direction? The biggest boy band of the decade? You know, "Na, na, na, na, beautiful", "Na, na, na, na-na, best song ever", ummm actually they are the only 1D songs I know.
One Direction loses a member
Aaaargh... Not the ripped photo cliché again
The best piece of advice I can give to all you teen girls out there is 'You will get through this'. It has happened before with Take That, Backstreet Boys and countless other boy bands. Even The Beatles split up due to creative difficulties and ego clashes (and not Yoko Ono as many people still claim).

Previous 1D posts... One Direction announce new album title | One Direction are the new Spice Girls

Another consolation is that young Mr. Malik made only minimal contributions to writing the songs recorded by 1D so I strongly doubt that the world will feel a big loss in that respect. There may be a subtle change in the dynamic of the performance, but this was a band manufactured by Simon Cowell, and I don't doubt that he has a replacement waiting in the wings so that the modular music machine may march on.

Harry Styles is particularly hurt because he already had plans to form a spin-off group with Louis Tomlinson called Both Directions.

There is much speculation about who could take the vacant spot in the line up, with Aaron Carter and Joey Fatone both throwing their hats into the ring. Personally my pick for Zayn's replacement would be Willard Carroll Smith III, a.k.a. Trey Smith, a.k.a. Will Smith's son, a.k.a. the only Smith kid without a music career yet, a.k.a. when you gonna stop mooching off the family and get yo'self a job.

Will Trey be the new Zayn?
Could Trey Smith be the new Zayn?
Sometimes the only way to get through the heartache of betrayal is to laugh, and while you don't think that it's possible to even smile through the tears, I am going to try to change that for you, with a joke that I just read on facebook.
Q: What's white and has 8 legs...?
A: One Direction
Who should replace Zayn in One Direction? What do you think of Zayn's solo career move? What's the best 1D joke you have heard? Share it all in the comments section below.

1 comment :

Zayniac said...

Now that they are at 4/5 of capacity they should be called 0.8 Direction

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