WTF? - Horror-scopes

As the rotation of the Earth slows, the direction of magnetic North is shifting towards Moscow, causing chaos for pilots trying to land at a Tampa airport.

You could need one of these

This is however of miniscule significance when compared to how the accompanying celestial shift has caused me to move from being a challenging and impulsive Aries to a conservative, concrete Taurus.

The relative positions of the constellations to the slowing Earth have changed, causing a 1 day adjustment to the boundaries of the 12 zodiac signs and therefore altering the personalities of about 1/30^th of the global population – those whose birthday falls on any one of the 12 borders or cusps between signs.

Which one are you?

We asked astrologist, LaZhara to explain how these changes will affect people.

“Most sequential signs have similarities and the majority of people whose sign has changed should not be greatly affected. Those who live on the cusp exhibit a certain duality and will not notice a big personality change, unless Pluto ascends into Uranus.”

Pluto ascending into Uranus?

Incidentaly, one twelfth of the population today could feel on edge and may jump at a sudden noise.

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