Friday, November 16, 2012

U2's Bono has town named after him

Legendary rock star and lead singer of U2, Bono, is about to have a town named after him. Killiniskyduff in Ireland is barely 50 miles south of Dublin, where Bono was born a little over half a century ago and will be renamed Bonoville in a New Year's Day ceremony on January 1st 2013.
Ireland map showing Dublin and Bonoville
Ireland looks like a koala bear
Although Bono is one of Ireland's most famous and beloved people, this is not an honor that the Irish are bestowing on him, this is pure ego nourishment for the U2 frontman. Bono actually forked out €2.7 million ($3.4 million) to buy the town of Killiniskyduff outright and relocate the 23 residents in nearby towns and villages. He then petitioned the magistrate of County Wicklow for permission to rename the town.

Bono's ego took a big knock after he recently saw Jim Carrey in The Mask and discovered that the movie was set in Edge City. This albeit fictional city seemingly named after Bono's bandmate, The Edge, created some jealous feelings and Bono set out to redress the balance of power in his favor.

After a failed attempt to purchase the already established city of Bono, Arizona, he looked a little closer to home and found Killiniskyduff just sitting there doing nothing, so he took out his checkbook and made them an offer.
Subject to planning permission, Bono is going to build an 8 foot high electric fence around the perimeter of Bonoville, which has an area of about 1 square mile, to keep the paparazzi and other "stalkers and gawkers" out. Sources close to Bono suggest that he plans to declare Bonoville a sovereign state in order to avoid paying any taxes and will appoint himself to the position of "Sir King Boss Bono, Emperor of all I survey". So far, nobody who actually knows him is able to confirm rumors that Bono actually plans to disappear up his own asshole in the near future.

For those who did not know, there are two other members of U2 and they also have things named after them. There is a Clayton Avenue in Los Angeles, named after Adam Clayton, the bass player, and the drummer has the Larry Mullen Jr. Hemorrhoid and Rectaloscopy wing of Ohio's Cleveland Central hospital named after him.

Larry Mullen Jr. Hemorrhoid & Rectaloscopy wing
Bono may need to visit here if he disappears up his own asshole

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