Wednesday, February 8, 2017

How Trump fixed the Super Bowl

By +Titan Young

This is Brad and I don't know a lot about sports, but I do know someone who does, and he has written a guest post for us. The opinions expressed below are entirely those of my friend and work colleague Titan Young.

Last Sunday, we saw one of the most exciting, one of the most unexpected, and one of the most heartbreaking Superbowl games of all time as Tom Brady's Patriots came back from a 25 point deficit to tie the game and claim an overtime victory. The result was so unbelievable that even Marty McFly thought that there was a typo in his Sports Almanac as the teams went in at half time.

Facts are starting to come about that President Trump tweeted to the Falcons at half time using one or more of his alternate accounts, with news that gave them a big enough reason to not score many more points in the second half.

Donald Trump tweets as John Barron to the Atlanta Falcons
Trump has gone on record under oath saying that he has used the pseudonym John Barron previously, and it was probably the inspiration for naming his 3rd and, so far, youngest son, Barron. Since the tweet cannot be proven to have come directly from Trump with my simple technology, and since he didn't exactly say something like "Throw the game and let football's whitest team win" then he can not be directly accused of fixing the game. 

There is also no evidence of Trump tweeting the Patriots telling Tom Brady to play the game of his life and come back from being 25 points down to win his fourth Super Bowl in six attempts, but there is little doubt that Brady needed any more celebrity encouragement than that which came from Mrs. Brady. 

Besides, what do we need evidence for? Many political facts floating around right now are pretty much unsubstantiated anyway. So long as you prefix everything with 'alternatively' and suffix it with 'allegedly' then you can say pretty much anything you want without fear of reprisal or threat of litigation. So now that you have read this far, you will have discovered that if we had the space, this post would have been titled "Alternate Breaking News: How Trump fixed the Super Bowl, allegedly"

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