Thursday, April 30, 2015

Apple bans fart apps from new watch

By +Brad Naylor

Tech giant and fan boy magnet Apple Inc. have surreptitiously banned all fart apps for their new apple watch according to some app developers. For those without imagination, the concept of a fart app is to hide the iPhone close to somebody else and while standing an inconspicuously safe distance away, press a button on the Apple Watch to trigger a fart sound from the iPhone, thus making it appear that the target 'let one rip'.

Apple has banned all fart apps for their watch
"Farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt!" How else would you write a fart sound?

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Do vampires really sparkle in sunlight?

By +Alexa Rankin

There have been some recent modifications to vampire lore thanks to the popularity of the Twilight books and movies, and TV shows like The Vampire Diaries. You may even say that they have been revamped (I'm not even remotely sorry for that one). The one modern misconception is that vampires are not only able to move around during the daytime, but they sparkle when sunlight hits their body.

Edward Cullen - Brooding with angst and sparkle
Edward Cullen - Brooding with angst and sparkle

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Top 10 misheard lyrics - Part 2

By +Ian C

It's been almost 5 years since the last misheard lyrics post, so I figured it was time for a new one. Misheard lyrics are becoming a big thing now with people deliberately inserting the wrong words for comedic effect, rather than enjoying genuine moments of ignorance followed by that gut wrenching epiphany when you realize that you have been singing the wrong words, out loud, in public.

David Spade is a misheard lyric
Which musician/group thinks that they are David Spade?

Monday, April 20, 2015

Deadly Nigerian disease just alcohol poisoning

By +Brad Naylor

A mysterious illness is sweeping through the Ode-Irele district of Nigeria, killing 18 people so far. The unknown disease kills it's victims within 24 hours without warning. Those who have been struck down complained of dizziness, blurred vision, vomiting, headache, loss of consciousness and then ultimately death.

Ondo. Nigeria
Nigeria, don't go there. It's dangerous. If it's not Ebola it's mystery death

Sunday, April 19, 2015

UK election polls show strong interest in labour

By +Sue Casa

With just 19 days to go before the United Kingdom elect a Prime Minister to a new term, we look at what William and Kate will name their new baby.

2015 Election News
2015 Election News

Friday, April 17, 2015

50 Shades of Grey- The Animated Series

By +Alexa Rankin

With the success of the E.L. James novels and the movie raking in over $250 million at the worldwide box office, the 50 shades franchise is definitely a money spinner. At least that's exactly what a small production company in Reno, NV are hoping for. Christasia Productions have signed an exclusive deal to produce 2 seasons of an animated show based on characters from the 50 Shades universe.

Fifty shades of animation
Coming soon to a cable channel near you

Sunday, April 12, 2015

What got slapped 12 months ago - April 2014

By +Tina Cruris

Happy April, Penguin Slappers. Do you ever lay awake at night wondering what we were doing 12 months ago? I don't blame you, there are much more important things to lie awake at night for. However, I suspect there may be an inkling of curiosity going on in your tiny little minds, which is one of the reasons that I write these reslap posts.

The other reasons include contractual obligation and good SEO (search engine optimization) practices, and of course I Love My Job. Taking old friends on a trip down memory lane and showing new friends how funny we used to be.

Friday, April 10, 2015

WTF? Selfie Sticks

By +Tina Cruris

By now I am sure many of you have seen at least one person using a 'selfie stick' and this fad keeps extending (not sorry for the pun). For those of you who have no clue what I am talking about, a selfie stick is an extendable, hand held monopod for your phone or camera which allows you to take a picture of yourself (selfie) from a distance or from an obscure angle without engaging a stranger to take the picture for you. If you still don't get it, here is a picture.

A Selfie Stick
Insert Witty Caption Here

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Apple introduce racially diverse iOS 8.3

By +Brad Naylor

This is probably old news to fanboys and iPhowners, but the new Apple mobile operating system iOS 8.3 is available for download and it has some new features and improvements, including over 70 bug fixes which have plagued iPhone 6 owners since iOS 8 was released.

iPhone 6 + iOS 8 = bugs
iPhone 6 + iOS 8 = bugs

Monday, April 6, 2015

Where are they now? Major League

By +Ian C

Considering that my local baseball team begins their season long monopoly of the minor local TV channels, I bring you a topical "Where are they now?" post featuring America's favorite pastime. 25 years ago, the movie theaters were packed with people watching baseball and singing along with "Wild Thing" as Major League, the funniest sports movie since Chariots of Fire Slapshot hit the big screens.

Major League Blu Ray
"I hate this fucking song"

Friday, April 3, 2015

Easter - A modern perspective

By +Brad Naylor

There are 2 days of the year when those Christians who don't regularly attend church make an extra special effort to dress up and praise the Lord. The first is Jesus' birthday or as it is more commonly known, Christmas. The second is Jesus' other birthday, the one when he was reborn, which we call Easter.

The Last Birthday Party
The Last Birthday Party

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Amazon's 1-click hookers

By +Alexa Rankin

Amazon's Home Services officially launched this week, offering over 2.4 million 'contractors' across 700+ categories from plumbing to home theater installation to goat rental. We even found what appeared to be a page offering the world's oldest professional service.

Amazon offers prostitutes
Amazon Home Services offer almost everything

Most viewed pages (last 30 days)

Slap the Penguin, more than just a satirical news blog

.